Welcome to our series on divorcing a narcissist. My name is Karla Mansur, and I am a divorce attorney based in Concord, Massachusetts. Through my extensive practice, I’ve encountered many individuals dealing with narcissistic partners. Narcissists often exhibit distinct behaviors that can be challenging to navigate. In this series, I’ll be exploring the key hallmarks of narcissism that frequently come up in divorce cases: control, isolation, conflict, gaslighting, and the often deceptive charm that accompanies these traits.

Are You Divorcing a Narcissist?

One of the most glaring signs that you are divorcing a narcissist is their extensive control over your life. Narcissists often exert this control through financial means, such as keeping major accounts under their name only and limiting your access to financial resources. They might track your movements through shared digital accounts and monitor your personal communications. Many clients come to me unaware of the extent of this control, only realizing the depth of the situation when it’s too late. Recognizing these signs early can be crucial in addressing and mitigating their impact.

Are You Divorcing a Narcissist? Part 2 Control

Another significant hallmark is isolation. Narcissists often systematically alienate their partners from family and friends. This can manifest as ruining social events, constant criticism, or demeaning behavior that drives loved ones away. Over time, this isolation erodes your support network, making you increasingly dependent on the narcissist. Understanding this pattern can help you rebuild your social connections and seek the support you need during a divorce.

Are You Divorcing a Narcissist? Part 3 Isolation

Conflict is another pervasive issue in relationships with narcissists. Narcissists are unable to accept blame and can turn any situation into a conflict, often making you feel as though you are walking on eggshells. If you find yourself constantly trying to appease your partner, with no success, this could indicate that you are dealing with a narcissist. The constant strife and your inability to resolve conflicts can be major red flags.

Are You Divorcing a Narcissist? Part 4 – Conflict

Finally, gaslighting is a tactic used by narcissists to distort reality and undermine your confidence. They may deny events that you clearly remember, making you question your own perceptions and sanity. If this form of psychological manipulation is a recurring issue in your marriage, it’s a strong indicator of narcissistic behavior. Recognizing gaslighting is essential for protecting your mental health and building a case for your divorce.

Are You Divorcing a Narcissist? Part 5 – Gaslighting

In conclusion, if you see these patterns in your relationship, it may be helpful to seek both legal advice and psychological support. Understanding the behaviors associated with narcissism can empower you to take the necessary steps towards a healthier future. Stay tuned for more insights in our ongoing series on divorcing a narcissist.